21 things learned from children?

Things I've Learned from My Children





1. Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.


2. A 3-year-old is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.





3. If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.





4. If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42-pound boy wearing Batman underwear and a superman cape. It is strong enough, however, to spread paint on all four walls of a large room.





5. When using the ceiling fan as a baseball bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.





6. The glass in windows (even double pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.





7. When you hear the toilet flush and the words "Uh-oh," it's already too late.





8. Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.





9. A six-year-old can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36-year-old man says they can only do it in the movies. A magnifying glass can start a fire even on an overcast day.





10. Certain Legos will pass through the digestive tract of a six-year-old.





11. "Play-Doh" and "microwave" should never be used in the same sentence.





12. Super glue is forever.





13. No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still can't walk on water.





14. Pool filters do not like Jell-O.





15. VCRs do not eject PB%26amp;J sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.





16. A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. foot house 4 inches deep.





17. Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise in a moving car.





18. You probably do not want to know what that odor is.





19. Always look in the oven before you turn it on. Plastic toys do not like ovens.





20. The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy. It will, however, make cats dizzy.





21. Cats spit up twice their body weight when dizzy.

21 things learned from children?
You forgot:





1. Nothing is unbreakable to a 4 year old;


2. Large screen TVs develop gravitational pull to ANY object thrown by a child (also any crystal glass);


3. children can become car sick in a stationary car;


4. children taught a foreign language remember swear words best and repeat them at the least appropriate moment;


5. The words "do you know that ... " from a child NEVER end with good news;


6. Anything with a high rotational speed is incompatible with children;





and the number one .... Children do not read warning labels (OK many adults don't) - don't assume they will.





BTW point 13 - it does work with custard (honest - I have seen this on film but it needs industrial quantities)
Reply:That is SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO


OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO


OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO


OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Halarious
Reply:funny
Reply:try to learn more n still love children
Reply:HA HA HA!very funny
Reply:Most of it is funny - lol
Reply:this is the best joke i heard since 90



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