Joke: Things you learn in life!(U HAVE 2 READ THIS!)?

Things I've Learned from My Children





1. Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.


2. A 3-year-old is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.





3. If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.





4. If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42-pound boy wearing Batman underwear and a superman cape. It is strong enough, however, to spread paint on all four walls of a large room.





5. When using the ceiling fan as a baseball bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.





6. The glass in windows (even double pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.





7. When you hear the toilet flush and the words "Uh-oh," it's already too late.





8. Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.





9. A six-year-old can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36-year-old man says they can only do it in the movies. A magnifying glass can start a fire even on an overcast day.





10. Certain Legos will pass through the digestive tract of a six-year-old.





11. "Play-Doh" and "microwave" should never be used in the same sentence.





12. Super glue is forever.





13. No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still can't walk on water.





14. Pool filters do not like Jell-O.





15. VCRs do not eject PB%26amp;J sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.





16. A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. foot house 4 inches deep.





17. Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise in a moving car.





18. You probably do not want to know what that odor is.





19. Always look in the oven before you turn it on. Plastic toys do not like ovens.





20. The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy. It will, however, make cats dizzy.





21. Cats spit up twice their body weight when dizzy.

Joke: Things you learn in life!(U HAVE 2 READ THIS!)?
this made me smile and yeah alot of those things are true i babysit a 3yr old and a 6yr old well i g2g thanks for posting that
Reply:had to give you a star. These are some of the reasons why I don't have kids.LOL thanks for the laugh.
Reply:omg!! so true man!!! lollszzz cool list!! =) gave u a star
Reply:hahaha
Reply:OK....I'll go with all of them except #21. How can a cat or any creature spit up twice their weight? The math escapes me.
Reply:i think i just randomly gave you a star i dont no why
Reply:those are so funny and so true... did all those things really happen to you?
Reply:Star 4 u, oh, and so, so true! ♥
Reply:sounds about right, and i did smile!
Reply:hahahahahaha


nice one


will star it


lol


where'd u find this


it's not real of course


LOL
Reply:This is great! I will email to my Son. he! he!
Reply:That's VERY funny. Good one Thanks for the LAUGH.
Reply:thanks that was really funny! im sending that to all my friends!!!
Reply:ok, I smiled here's your star.
Reply:LOL, exept for the cat part.....(frown)
Reply:Its so funny,yet so true. lol Keep em coming.
Reply:printing it and posting on fridge



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